Why do intelligent, successful couples become stuck over where to live, whose career comes first, or what their future should look like? This article explores the unconscious fears beneath practical disagreements, including caretaking, appeasement, achievement and autonomy, while introducing reflective exercises that encourage honest conversations and shared decision-making between partners.

Your browser does not support the audio element. Listen to: When Love and Geography Don’t Agree 0:00 0:00 A Companion to Living Apart, Staying Together By Ari Sotiriou MA PGDip psychodynamic psychotherapist When I first wrote this article and the accompanying worksheet, my aim was to support couples […]

Why does loving feedback sometimes feel like a personal attack? This article explores how childhood experiences, attachment patterns, and core beliefs can make even requests feel threatening. Drawing on British Psychoanalytic Theory and CBT, it explains defensiveness in relationships and how therapy can help partners move from blame, shame, and conflict towards understanding and connection.